The relationship between a mother and her son is priceless.

November 18th, 2004 changed my life forever. It changed my life in the best way possible, forever. Bentley is my little buddy, he's such an amazing kid. Everyday, he amazes Forrest and I with things he says and does, where does he come up with this stuff. Sometimes, Forrest and I will just sit here, looking at Bentley, astonished at how funny he is, how smart he is, and how much we can see eachother and ourselves in him.

The other day, he went to school like he does every week. I got there to pick him up and his teacher kind of motioned for me to go to the side so she could tell me something. I was kind of worried that Bentley had misbehaved, said something embarassing or something of that nature. Instead, Teacher Barbara let me know that he did not eat lunch. Okay, no big deal.... right? Then she tells me what he said his reasoning for not eating was..... Oh my gosh, little boy! He informed the whole lunch room that we had just bought groceries the night before, and that his parents bought him Dino shaped nuggets and he was NOT eating because he was going home and eating those! Personally, I thought it was kind of funny..... Teacher Barb, not so much. What can ya do?

I've had a tough time facing the fact that come September, my baby is starting Kindergarten! KINDERGARTEN, seriously. Where does the time go? He may be ready, but I am so not ready for this! Before I know it, he will have girls calling, friends picking him up, a drivers license, prom, HIGH SCHOOL. Wow.... Time sure does fly.

I guess I just needed to think tonight, my baby isn't going to be a "baby" forever, but he will, however, be MY baby. He's a Mama's boy and Daddy's boy, alike. We are so lucky to have this ray of sunshine, this little spitfire, this growing handsome boy in our lives every single day! What would life be like without my Bentley Bug? It sure would be boring, that is for sure.

And as I close my blog for the night, I have to share this song. I know that each and every Mom and Dad out there will be touched by it, because it's true! Hold your babies and kiss them lots tonight. They aren't going to be little forever!
Your Gonna Miss This

Weight Loss Wednesday!

I've been working so hard for the last week in my weight loss. I'm kind-of sort-of  following Weight Watchers, without going to meetings. I am happy to announce that I am down three pounds! It may not seem like a lot, but I am ever so proud of myself! I have a long ways to go to reach my goal, but I am going to get there, hopefully before August, like I've been planning. I have 27 more to go before I hit that goal. I decided to set a mini-goal for myself, to keep myself motivated!

My mini-goal is to get down 15 pounds by March 1st. I think I can do it as long as I stick with what I've been doing, and maybe step up my workout a knotch!

So from now on, Wednesday will be my day to check in with how my diet is going!

Size 10, here I come!!!!

Post It Note Tuesday!

What a great idea! How could I not join in, and I'm sure I will have more to add through out the day! Thanks Ashley for directing people to this! So much fun!!

Here are mine:

Relationship Status: MARRIED

Love enables you to put your deepest feelings and fears in the palm of you partner's hand, knowing they will be handled with care.

~Carl S. Avery

Today I am so thankful for Forrest. He really is my very best friend in the whole wide world. He's a great father, a wonderful husband, a compassionate friend, and everything else that contributes to a great person.


It seems like yesterday that I met him for the first time, December 1st, 2002. We were so young and the whole "love at first sight" thing came into play instantly. He was everything I was looking for in the person I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. How lucky was I to meet him at 18, when life was really just starting. Luckily, I got to start my life with him when my life was just starting!


It's been eight years since that day. While we've had speed bumps, potholes, manholes and ditches in the road, I wouldn't trade it for anything. The struggles of life that we've been through has made us grown so much as a couple. There were times when I think we both wanted to throw that white flag up and surrender, (along with the 1 time I actually did, what was I thinking?) but it's 2010 and here we are. I won't say that we don't have our tiffs and arguements, if any couple says they don't, they are lying.


I have never been so happy in my life than where I am right now. While we may not have a big house, expensive cars, designer clothes, or more money than we know what to do with, we have eachother and to me, that is what matters! I wake up everyday knowing that I have my rock, Forrest, to get through the days struggles with. And even though sometimes I might not let him know it, he is my everything. Even when he's pushing my buttons, I'm pushing his, or Bentley's pushing the both of ours, we love eachother. That is such a special thing to me. I grew up with divorced parents. I didn't have parents that showed affection to eachother (when they were together) I never knew what a "strong relationship" between a husband and wife could be. I am forever greatful that we can give that to Bentley. I think people sometimes forget something as simple as their children hearing their parents say "I love you" to eachother and what that can mean. Maybe it's because I have been on the other side of the spectrum that it means so much to me. I don't know, but I do know that I can express how greatful I am for our relationship.


In 2004, we welcomed our beautiful baby boy into this world. What a day that was. Looking into my husbands eyes as he beamed down over his baby boy, so proud, was the best thing I have ever seen. A relationship between a father and son is like nothing else.


I am ready for that again. I am ready to expand our family, I am ready to see my husband, the love of my life, beam as he gazes down at OUR baby, a baby WE created.


While I feel this post kind of bounced around, what better way for it to be. Life is never on a straight path. We rarely ever end up right where we thought we'd be, and that is definitely okay with me. As long as I have Forrest by my side, walking hand in hand down that winding road, I know all will be okay.


I hope that everyone, at one point or another, experiences that in their lives. I just thank God everyday that I get to experience it everyday of my life.

Life is a rollercoaster...

"Nobody can go back and start a new begining, but anyone can start today and make a new ending." - Maria Robinson

I finally did it. I finally sent the letter to my dad. The letter that told him how I've felt abandoned for the past 10 years. The letter that told him how hurt I am that he missed all of the important things in my life. The letter that told him Goodbye. I felt better for the first hour after I sent it, I felt accomplished, I felt relieved, I felt.... better. I kept telling myself it was over and done with. I had cut the ties and I was "free" of feeling that sadness anymore. I was wrong. I caught myself checking my messages every 10 minutes to see if he had responded. (Even though I had asked him to have no further contact with me, I knew that wouldn't stick.) I decided to check one last time before I headed to bed, and there it was.... One new message from "Dad" Maybe I should have just saved it for tomorrow, but I couldn't wait to see how mad he was at the things I had pointed out. He wasn't mad at all. Instead, it made me feel worse. It made me feel like the bad guy. I felt like I was the one who abandoned him. He didn't point fingers or put the blame on me. He merely told me that he knew he had done wrong. Keep in mind, not once did he say the word "sorry" in the whole letter he wrote back. Instead, things like "Don't give up on me. Give me one more chance to prove to you and C that I can be a Dad." And I'm the one feeling guilty? Why? Why do I allow myself to feel this way?! It's not fair, it really isn't. It's not fair to me, to Forrest, or to Bentley that I can sit here and blame myself after ten years of disappointment from that man.

And so, I'm going to do something about it. I will no longer allow him to control my emotions in this way. I am a mother, a wife, a daughter, a sister, and a friend. I am all of these things without him and have been all of these things without him for the past ten (1o!!!) years! Why should I change any of that by moping around and having a pity party for myself? I'm not going to do it! I have a family of my own now and that is what matters the most in my life!

This brings me to my "What inspires me" thoughts. What does inspire me? It may seem silly, but the friendships that I have built from my online friends inspires me. A few of the women that I call my friends on my Mommy board shared their "dad" stories with me and how they overcame the pain and hurt that their father's had caused them. These women inspired me to write my dad the letter, to tell him my thoughts and feelings, and if I felt that it was best for me to cut ties, so be it. And that is just what I did. I'm thankful for these women every day, I share someof my life with them and they just listen. So ladies, when you read this, (you know who you are) thank you. You are my inspiration in dealing with my emotions and my father. It was just nice getting opinions from people outside of the box, so to say, that don't know me or my dad or any other party involved. While I have many other inspirations in doing what I did (My mom being one of them, and of course my wonderful husband!), I just wanted to write about this one for today.

In dealing with the "loss" of my father, I can only become a better parent because of it. My goals to live by to get through my tough time this week!

• I choose to be a better parent and not shadow the things I saw my own Father do!
• I choose to love my family for who they are and what they do, no matter what!
• I choose to wake up every day with a smile on my face!
• I will give myself goals and reward myself when I achieve them!

*XoXo*

Liss